logansrogue: (*sigh*)
Hey all.

So basically, I'm making the switch to Dreamwidth permanently now. It's sad for me, as I've been on here since LJ pretty much started. But given the new user agreement and the anti-LGBTQI crap mixed up in that, I can't in all good conscience keep using this website (though I barely use it anyway).

If you know my real name, that's who I am over on facebook. I'm also logansrogue over at dreamwidth. I will probably keep the two accounts linked, and this journal up, but if anything happens to it, I won't try to bring it back.

The one sad thing about the internet, which it doesn't have on chiselled words on rocks or ink on paper - it can be lost so easily.

Love you all. <3

Addendum: I think LJ deleted my default userpic because it was Xena, and she's GEY.
logansrogue: (Default)
It's like, I'm too stubborn to get rid of it, God damn it.

How are you dudes?
logansrogue: (Default)
Does anyone still use LJ? I miss it. I was reading over old posts today, looking at how far I've come since I was assaulted in 2008.

How are you all? Talk to me!
logansrogue: (Default)
So, I had a baby. And she is GORGEOUS. I am so utterly and completely in love with her. Every day is a new challenge but it's okay so far - it's all worth it. I'm run down to the bone, my pelvis is a stretched out old rubber band, but I'm mother to a little pixie who owns me heart and soul so I'm totally okay with that.

Plus my partner is a fucking amazing Dad.

Anyway, I'm taking up my LJ again because I don't want to bother my Facebook friends with too much baby blogging. I can do it here and keep it organised.

logansrogue: (delight me mermaid)
You know you're in love when your partner's wrinkles, which have developed since you've started going out because you've been together for five years, are dead sexy and beautiful and perfect to you. :-P
logansrogue: (Default)
Apparently I'm doing it:


The comment string starting with Victor England. What a toss pocket! It's really hilarious watching him whip himself into a rage because a) his insults don't bother me because they are actually points of great pride for me, b) it's obviously bothering him that his sexist, misogynistic invective is bouncing off me like a coin off a drumhead.

I'm a feminist calling you on your shit and I'm not going anywhere! Ner her nee ner ner.
logansrogue: (Default)
I am absolutely delighted. The gender was the one I wanted! Not that I would have minded either way, but I had an instinct that it was one gender and I was worried my instinct was wrong. But I was right. :)

I have a video of the ultrasound session. I love watching it. It's about 20 minutes long and I love watching Bubsy wave, and wriggle, and its heartbeat, and its sweet little face in the 3D shots.

I love this baby more than anything I've ever loved in my life. :)
logansrogue: (Default)
Tomorrow I go to my 19 week scan to check on bubsy.

Every day now, I get naked before my shower and just look at my body. All my life, the pregnant body has been a source of wonder, joy, warmth. It was the body of a goddess to me, of a heightened state that I had seen so often. I think, on some level, in the past few years I'd convinced myself that it's a state I didn't deserve, that I wasn't good enough to achieve.

But here I am. My breasts are huge and heavy, they are like great ripe fruit, firm and round. And my belly, when hidden under clothes, is lost and small. But when I'm naked, and my regular fit curves and muscles are in stark contrast to these new lines: Round, firm, fertile... My heart is SO huge and full of love and excitement I can barely contain it. I stroke and caress them, not for me but for my baby inside. "I love you," I tell them, "I love you so much and I will never, ever stop loving you."

After having a miscarriage, each day with this wee child is a blessing. The reality of the change in my body is setting in, but I feel very little of the sadness of what my body has become. It is an immense blessing to me, something I never thought I would attain.

I feel SO lucky. I feel SO warm and complete. Little One, I wish I could tell you the change you have made in me. Already, at 19 weeks, I am a better person. And I just want to be better and better, all for you, my love.
logansrogue: (Default)
I wish people could see themselves the way I see them.
I wish they knew the hunger to see not perfect faces,
But unique stories on features fresh in my vision.
Curves to cheeks I've never yet encountered,
Eye colours reflecting the myriad hues of simple reality.
I wish they could feel the joy I feel in seeing their smiles,
Or the way they gaze out a window on a train,
Or the gentle expression they give their fussing child.
A warmth grows in my soul at a rosy cheek,
Real and not covered with beauty cream.
A stubbled chin, a wild, hairy brow.
A dimpled knee, an exquisite mop of unruly hair.
And I know if I asked, many of them would suddenly be shamed
At all these things that lift my soul
But are always airbrushed away.
I wish they had the experience of what it is to record these faces,
Etching them deep within a part of the mind
I dip into when I create.
And encyclopaedia of features that I zealously treasure,
Like an OCD dragon on a hoard of gold, not just collecting
But understanding and analysing and knowing,
Glorying in every detail and thanking the Universe for its variety.
I wish they knew. I wish you knew.
I wish you felt what I feel, how glorious you all are.
I wish I could look at myself and be so generous.
logansrogue: (Default)
It's getting good now... )
logansrogue: (poirotleshit)
ADMIN NOTE: If you happen to go through something like this, please feel free to post about it to. It just happened to me the other day and I know of nobody else that would be as ecstatic about it as other Poirot fans. Sorry if this is spammy!

I am now relaying my experience here in the city of Perth just a few days ago. It was LE AWESOME.

So, I'm out with a friend... )
logansrogue: (Default)
Here we go moos!

Eps 1... )
logansrogue: (Default)
Eps 21-23 )

So. Season one. Some really stupid parts, but a few characters I got hooked onto. On to season 2! :D
logansrogue: (Default)
So, I'm catching up on my "Things people are talking about and maybe I should check out" list, and I've been giving "Arrow" a look. I'm three eps down, just starting to watch the fourth episode.

Blog as I watch... )

Well, I am going to do something else for a while. I'm all Arrow'd out.

logansrogue: (Default)
To the tune: MUSICAL

Have you ever taken two
cocks into your hole?
Did you want someone to just
To spooge right to your soul?
You don't have to choose!
There's no need to cry!
Polyamory might be for you
It might just change your life!

And that, my friends, is why I should not be allowed to play children's games.
logansrogue: (petshopgirls)
I just got a bit of spam mail hawking fillers to "correct your features that time (blah blah aging stuff blah blah)". I thought about that word. We're often told that we need things to "correct" stuff on our faces. And then I thought, what do you correct? You correct a mistake.

Listen, beauty industry. My face is NOT a mistake. My features, my wrinkles, my spots, my sags - they are a part of my face, okay? A face that is here to emote and carry my spirit. It is NOT a mistake, it never WILL be a mistake, even when it's wrinkled and saggy and spotty should I have the good fortune of growing old. Just straight up say, "This shit is to cover up your real human features and deny yourself the humanity you have a right to own." Cause that's basically what you're selling. And most women are okay with buying that.
logansrogue: (Default)
I just watched Ruby Sparks, which really should be marketed as a psychological thriller rather than a comedy or a romantic comedy, of which it was neither. It was disturbing, terrifying, squirm-worthy and I totally hated the writer guy by the end of the movie. He was a self-centred douchebag who suffered from problems entirely of his own creation. I just wanted to hit him repeatedly. His made up girlfriend was everything he didn't deserve.

You know a character you create in a script is loathesome when the ideal girlfriend HE creates for himself dumps him. When you reach that point, you as a writer MUST realise that the character is hateful, and you must look at your story and see it for what it is, not what you want it to be. Yeah, I'm talking to the people that made this film.

Another thought I had while watching this movie is that you really would have to hate yourself to limit your life partner to the ideal person that you think you want. If you asked me what would have been perfect for me, say, five or six years ago, it would have been a very different answer from today.

Anyway, I chuckled and thought that my imagination could never create someone that makes me as happy as Daniel does. He is good for me because he is outside of my mental universe. He challenges me, nurtures me, surprises me. My brain just does not keep up with him, and I love that about him. One minute he can be sitting at the table figuring out harmonic theory. The next he'll be giggling about a dick joke.

This is why I love him, everybody.
logansrogue: (Ein Minuten Bitte!)
A lot of people are saying that they're not going to dance on Fred Phelp's grave or celebrate that he's gone. They're all straight people, and I'm kind of - I'm not angry or anything, but I feel uncomfortable. There's this movement that people want to be "better than Fred Phelps" and not be a horrible human being, but I feel that it speaks over the feelings of queer people who have been deeply hurt by Phelps' legacy. I mean - he was a man that wanted people like me dead. He celebrated the death of my queer brothers and sisters. I feel relief that he is gone. I am GLAD he is gone. He is another nail in the coffin of a horrible movement and a generation of hate-filled bigots that I will pray to God go the way of the dodo. And I think we queer folk are entitled to those emotions. I am not a bad person for being glad that he's gone. And to bang on the "We're better than that drum" kinda speaks over the real pain and anguish that queer people might want to express as this man's passing. Anger is a right too. I'm angry at him, I hate him, and I'm not ashamed of those things - I have the right to feel that way when someone does the things that this man did. I'm not going to dwell on them or anything, so it's not like it's going to blacken my soul. It's a flush of lightness in my heart that the world has one less asshole threatening the life of people like me on a daily basis. I'm not going to be ashamed of that.


logansrogue: (Default)

April 2017



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