Discussion Question at Shakesville

Hey all.

There's a really awesome question being asked at Shakesville, but the comment count is HUGE and I thought it'd be nice for me to answer it in my own journal. I figure maybe you guys might have some interesting stories as well that I know I'd love to hear!

What has someone wrongly assumed about you because you are a woman? (Or because they first wrongly assumed that you are a woman.)

People are often surprised to hear that I hate weddings. I really don't like them. Helping my little sister with hers only cemented my loathing for traditional weddings. Seriously, if I ever find myself in the position of needing to get married, I will put on a white dress that I like that I can wear at later occasions (something 30s and fabulous), go down to the nearest body of water with whoever I'm marrying and then do my vows with an alternatively spiritual celebrant. Family can sit on the grass/sand/whatever and watch. And then, I'll have a barbecue on a warm day with sunshine. There'll be food laid out, but it will be easy to prepare and will be more likely the spirit of a casserole night rather than a wedding, which is usually ridiculously expensive and yucky because caterers can't cook worth a damn.

I've also been mistaken for my niece's mother before, but I think that's because Ruby and I look ridiculously alike.

Men have also wrongly assumed that I like having my arse squeezed at pubs and clubs. They have promptly discovered that no, I don't, and I'm not afraid to tell them as such.

I'm lucky enough that I'm not aware of most of the things people have assumed about be because I'm a woman. I've had the wonderful fortune of knowing very progressive people with widely varying tastes and gender representations, and my good fortune seems to continue with age. So I'll write a list of things that aren't what mainstream media and the dominant heteronormative culture would expect of me, being a woman:

- I don't like hair dye or excessively styling my hair with damaging products.
- I don't shave my armpits.
- I don't give a shit about Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Aniston.
- I have never seen Sex in the City. If I want to watch a group of sassy broads talk about sex, I'll watch The Golden Girls, thanks.
- I like retro V8 cars from the 70s. They are sexy.
- I also like VWs of every stripe.
- I am obsessive about trains and boats.
- I don't care if the wind messes up my hair.
- I don't wear make-up unless it's a special occassion.
- I don't wear perfume unless I have to.
- I don't spend hours on the phone.
- I don't generally go on about my problems to my boyfriend. I have a psych for that.
- I fart around my brothers and sisters. It's hilarious.
- I am not afraid to talk about my ladyness. Examples; my gynie, my vagina, my lady-bits, my tits, my boobers, my periods, Red Hell, my girly-hard-on (they so exist).
- I'm not afraid of bugs, moths and butterflies, worms, amphibians, reptiles or birds.
- I like being messy.
- I am obsessed with comics, mostly creating rather than collecting.
- I like the arts, as in actual gritty, confronting art. When I do the non-fandom stuff, that is.
- I have huge feet.
- I swear.
- I say what I mean, when I want to, wherever I want to, as long as it hurts nobody's feelings and isn't a damaging thing to say.
- I put off doing the washing.
- I rarely iron anything. Cause I hate it, and I hate standing up for long periods of time.

Ways in which I fulfill those stereotypes:

- I do like the colour pink.
- Shiny things attract me like a bower bird.
- I like clothes.
- I like shoes.
- I like playing with make-up when the mood takes me and I have a massive collection of eyeshadows and lipgloss/lipstick.
- I love nailpolish and have well over a hundred bottles of the stuff.
- I don't like being close to spiders. I am arachnophobic, though I don't hate them. I love them in their natural environment, AWAY FROM ME.
- I like putting my hair into interesting hairstyles.
- When I do get dressed up, I really enjoy it.
- I like babies, kittens, puppies, baby ducks and other cute things like that.
- I have more glitter than one woman really needs.
- I like fairies/faeries and other mythical creatures.
- I love dolphins.
- I play the Sims games.
- I like jewelry (cheap jewelry, though I do yearn for a real gold bracelet since I lost my last one).
- I like looking pretty.
- I have pictures of pretty men on my wall.
- I like crafts.
- I sometimes wear frilly underwear with bows.

I could probably go on, but I think you get the point. :) Feel free to talk about the ways in which you fulfill or buck the stereotypes. <3

Magpies Are Awesome: Party 123120923812...

Okay, so my Mum was sitting in bed this morning, listening to our dominant male magpie do the rounds out the front of our house and go through his usual vocalisations. He's a pretty fantastic bird, in that he pushes the magpie habit of imitation to its very limits. He's been heard doing the following sounds:

- Sirens
- Other birds
- People ("Hello")
- Electronic devices (mobile phones, car security sounds)

And he had a new one in his repetoire this morning. This morning - he meowed. And not just any meow. It was the exact meow of my cat Lennon.

I shit you not.

I asked Mum, "Are you sure Lenny wasn't there talking to him?"

She said she was sure he wasn't, that the vocalisations were consistent in a pattern that the magpie went through. So, you know, colour me stunned. My big bro actually blinked, repeatedly, in that "WTF?!" way when I told him.

Odin, you are officially the coolest fucking magpie I've ever known.

Merlin 3.12

( Reaction Post - SPOILERS! )

Oh, For Fuck's Sake!

This Government Offical is NOT a Grinch.

It's the Holiday Season and New Year. He said not to put religious icons up in the Centrelink buildings, he wasn't banning Christmas celebrations all together. I think having tinsel, stars and greenery is enough to get the message across that they're celebrating a holiday. Shoving religious icons in people's faces that don't want them isn't professional.

Having Nativity scenes in your house is one think, Plibersek, but you don't do it somewhere where people of all religious beliefs (and of course those without religious beliefs) have to conduct their daily business.

And no, I have never, ever seen decorations for other religious celebrations up in my local Centrelinks. Granted I haven't been into a Centrelink building for years (THANK FUCK) but in my time having to go there, no, no I did not see anything but Christmas decorations at Christmas time.

Dear Jessica Coen...

Dear Jessica Coen,

Are you fucking KIDDING ME? No, seriously? This is it? This is your big apology? One you don't even have the fucking gumption to open to comments? You're coming down on high and telling us hysterical bitches that it's GOOD for us to face the views of rape-apologetic douchebags?

I'm sorry, but that is the biggest load of horse-shit I have ever read in my life. I cannot, for all the world, understand why you try to defend the indefensible. It's not as though the readers at Jezebel are LACKING in exposure to the views of misogynists, rapists, sexists and the down-right clueless. You guys are on the Gawker network after all! There was NO REASON WHATSOEVER, no laudable, right, good, acceptable reason to publish that article.

It was triggering, it was dangerous, it was hurtful and it was DISGUSTING.

Your actions are cynical, cruel, callous and unsympathetic. Congratulations, you threw your readership overboard.

No love,
Napalmnacey.