Sad news about Zapp

[logansrogue]

Hey everyone.

He had an ultrasound today and the results that came back were very bad news indeed. He has a torn diaphragm and his guts are herniating - his intestines are going up into his chest cavity. One of his kidneys doesn't have a good blood supply and in time part of it will die and begin to necrotise. There is a lot wrong with his guts and they don't think he has the strength to survive the huge surgery that would be needed to correct everything. Even then, he might be in pain and not have a full quality of life.

So the vet recommended to Rolf that Zapp be euthanaised. It was so hard spending time with him. He's got so much fight in him, he kept lifting his head and meowing loudly, as if asking why he had to stay there and why he couldn't come home with us.

I've not cried over this. I don't know what's wrong with me. I have so much sadness inside of me, so much I can barely cope. This sort of resolute stoicism keeps taking me over, though. I'll probably bawl like a baby when we bury him tomorrow.

Why Zapp? Why such a darling? You've seen the photos - a fluffy bear, a little stripey lion. He was so happy with Rogue, they were such an adorable pair. He's only eight months old. Why so young? Why now? It's just not right or fair. He's still a baby. He's not even properly grown up yet.

I don't understand, I probably never will. This wasn't supposed to happen. :( Okay, I'm going to stop whining and try to distract myself somehow. The worst thing is that this is going to cost Rolf something like 3000 dollars, and he doesn't even get a cat out of it. AND he's got an adult disabled son to care for. Zapp was Johnny's companion cat :(

Ugh, life sucks.

Comments

[likebunnies.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Sometimes things are just too big to cry over and sometimes it's just easier to cry over the little things in life. I am so sorry about the poor kitty. *more hugs*

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

A bunch of people were singing 'Hallelujah' in church on ABC. I burst into tears.

*hugs*

[transcendancing.livejournal.com]

I'm so so so sorry to hear about this - I was so hopeful all along that he would pull through.

I'm thinking of you :(

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

Thanks. *hug* It's him I'm sad for. You can see he loves life and doesn't want it to end. :(

[greenforest-elf.livejournal.com]

*HUGS*

I so know what your going thru as I just got some awful news from my vet a few days ago about one of my dogs.

Sometimes life just sucks!

[shantari.livejournal.com]

With something big like this, the tear come later. You might even partly be in denial. *hugs you*

[miconic.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm so sorry to hear about Zapp. I know that he's loved, and will always be.

[angriest.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to hear this.

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Thanks, Grant.

[starfyre01.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to read about Zapp. It's heartbreaking, but I also think that being euthanized is the most humane thing that you can do for him. It was awful when we had to put our first dog, Snoopy, to sleep, so I know how you're feeling :-( It's good to know that the little guy's had a wonderfully high quality of life and fiercely loved.

{{{{Nacey}}}}

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

We loved him mightily. And he had lots of food, lots of hugs, lots of fun times with Rogue. It's just a shame his stay was so short :(

[nephron.livejournal.com]

Not crying at this point doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. It's probably a coping strategy, to get you through this horrible stressful time. You'll probably find you'll start crying soon enough.

Even if you don't, there's nothing wrong with not crying. Different people respond differently to grief on different occasions.

*hugs*

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

See, the reason I found this odd is because I'm an incredibly emotional person. These kittens fulfilled a lot of maternal instincts that are really revving up as I get older. Rogue is my new baby and Zapp was around here to play with her a lot. I wanted him but I could only have one kitten. It was the perfect set up. He made everyone so happy. I thought I should be crying but the whole time in the vet I just held my shit together.

It was stupid - I started bawling my eyes out hours later, when a community choir started singing Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" on TV. They weren't even singing it very well. I lost it. *shakes head*

[azinazelle.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to hear about Zappie. I really was hoping he'd pull through and everything would okay. But sadly life isn't always fair and the good sometimes do die young. But not letting him suffer in the end is one of the best gifts you could give him.

I didn't cry over Snowcap when she died. I guess I have a different mechanism. I was quite angry and this seemed even worse than not crying at all.

Maybe this is too early to start discussing this ... but if Rolf gets another kitten, maybe he should consider making it a completely indoor cat. I know cats adore being outside and exploring, but too much shit happens outdoors (wild animals, disease, cars :( ) We lost one cat to a car ... it's not worth the pain and suffering (from both owner and cat) in the end.

[xedra.livejournal.com]

*hugs hugs and hugs some more*

[alya1989262.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm so, so sorry! *hugs you fiercely*

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[berenicepotter.livejournal.com]

*hugshugshugshugshugshugshugs*

[annearchy.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry, Nancy *hugs*

[melalucci.livejournal.com]

Mother fucker.

I'm sorry, I just hate that news. :( ::big hugs:: I wish there was something someone could do...but at least we can still pray that Zapp passes the way he deserves to. :(

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

The swearing is okay, you know me. :) If it's any consolation, it was a quiet, gentle passing.

[asweetdownfall.livejournal.com]

Frak. God.

I am so, so sorry.

*hugs* You're not whining.

[logansrogue.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Good to know. Thanks, Nitya.