The 'Rape' Fantasy
Mar. 8th, 2007 06:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
logansrogueInteresting to see women respond to this Dolce & Gabana ad on ONTD.
See, I'm... I'm funny on this issue. I think it's okay for women to have their fantasies. But there's a distinct list of things that I do not fantasise about, that I never will and find extremely disturbing. Those are:
- Abuse
- Rape
- Incest
- Myself being dominated.
Now, maybe it's been my upbringing with my overbearing father making me buck any sort of authority figure or dominance (armchair psychology ahoy) or the fact that I've been brought up by my staunch feminist of a mother, but nothing turns me off more than a male seeking dominance or control. There has only ever been ONE situation where being overpowered by a man in a sexual situation didn't bother me, and that's because I implicitly trusted the man and I knew that he'd rather poke out his own eyeballs than hurt me (or any living thing for that matter). And it was playful anyhow.
I don't *like* being vulnerable. I don't like being reminded of being vulnerable. When I'm naked and in bed with someone, I'd prefer to feel empowered. Not in the sense that I dominate over the other partner - I couldn't stand that. I like two people being intensely excited by the other just being there and the power is in what they do to each other.
Am I nuts? Crazy? Unusual? Let me know what you think.
See, I'm... I'm funny on this issue. I think it's okay for women to have their fantasies. But there's a distinct list of things that I do not fantasise about, that I never will and find extremely disturbing. Those are:
- Abuse
- Rape
- Incest
- Myself being dominated.
Now, maybe it's been my upbringing with my overbearing father making me buck any sort of authority figure or dominance (armchair psychology ahoy) or the fact that I've been brought up by my staunch feminist of a mother, but nothing turns me off more than a male seeking dominance or control. There has only ever been ONE situation where being overpowered by a man in a sexual situation didn't bother me, and that's because I implicitly trusted the man and I knew that he'd rather poke out his own eyeballs than hurt me (or any living thing for that matter). And it was playful anyhow.
I don't *like* being vulnerable. I don't like being reminded of being vulnerable. When I'm naked and in bed with someone, I'd prefer to feel empowered. Not in the sense that I dominate over the other partner - I couldn't stand that. I like two people being intensely excited by the other just being there and the power is in what they do to each other.
Am I nuts? Crazy? Unusual? Let me know what you think.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2007-03-08 10:26 pm (UTC)I guess I've felt the effects of real rape in my life and I see it as nothing but horrific and damaging. I can't mentally separate it from fantasy because it's just too painful. (No, I haven't been raped but my older sister was and it was a terrible upset to our family.)