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The Mad Rush
Dec. 8th, 2008 08:15 pmCAN I finish BirdMartiaN Issue 01 by the 31st of December?
STAY TUNED, DARLINGS!
STAY TUNED, DARLINGS!
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11 / 18 (61.1%) |
Dec. 8th, 2008
YES DOODS YES YES YES!!!!
Dec. 8th, 2008 08:20 pmTHE TICKETS TO SEE THE WHO ARRIVED TODAY.
OH MY GOD I THINK I'M GOING TO ORGASM!!!
OH MY GOD I THINK I'M GOING TO ORGASM!!!
Fuck you, Centrelink.
Dec. 8th, 2008 11:56 pmSo today I got a letter that told me they'd rejected me for the Disability Pension. I'm not entirely surprised. I can still walk and I seem fairly with it when you talk to me. They don't see me sitting in bed for hours, unable to sleep due to debilitating abdominal pain, or any of the other shit I have to deal with.
I want to fucking punch my doctor for filling in the form badly. I have to do this all again, I guess.
I'm just so tired of fighting with the world. I'm tired of trying to get people to see that I'm not slack, I'm not giving up, I'm not laying down. It's not that I'm NOT TRYING, it's not that I am letting it win.
I AM FIGHTING EVERY DAY TO FUCKING SURVIVE. I am fighting depression, I'm fighting endometriosis, I am fighting trauma, I am fighting anaemia.
I am sick of this, so fucking heartily SICK OF THIS. I am sick of being shunted from one department to another because Centrelink doesn't know what to do with me. I am sick of explaining to these WITLESS FUCKS that I CAN'T TAKE PUBLIC TRANSPORT ANYWHERE, as walking long distances is IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME.
I'm sick of stupid fucking people that have it in their heads that I'm not working to fix my situation.
I'm sick of looking at my future and seeing nothing but destitution and misery because I can't make any money for myself. I know my father worries about me, about once he's gone. I don't tell him that I'm frightened too, that I'm scared I'll end up homeless or living in a tiny shithouse room in the middle of nowhere because I can't pay for rates in the house.
I just want something to go right for once, you know? I just want to get to be happy for a LITTLE WHILE. I don't want much, I just want to be able to look after myself enough that I can get stuff done. Stuff that might concievably lead to enough success that I won't need payments anymore, you know?
God I hate my life sometimes. Sometimes it just gets to be too fucking much.
I want to fucking punch my doctor for filling in the form badly. I have to do this all again, I guess.
I'm just so tired of fighting with the world. I'm tired of trying to get people to see that I'm not slack, I'm not giving up, I'm not laying down. It's not that I'm NOT TRYING, it's not that I am letting it win.
I AM FIGHTING EVERY DAY TO FUCKING SURVIVE. I am fighting depression, I'm fighting endometriosis, I am fighting trauma, I am fighting anaemia.
I am sick of this, so fucking heartily SICK OF THIS. I am sick of being shunted from one department to another because Centrelink doesn't know what to do with me. I am sick of explaining to these WITLESS FUCKS that I CAN'T TAKE PUBLIC TRANSPORT ANYWHERE, as walking long distances is IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME.
I'm sick of stupid fucking people that have it in their heads that I'm not working to fix my situation.
I'm sick of looking at my future and seeing nothing but destitution and misery because I can't make any money for myself. I know my father worries about me, about once he's gone. I don't tell him that I'm frightened too, that I'm scared I'll end up homeless or living in a tiny shithouse room in the middle of nowhere because I can't pay for rates in the house.
I just want something to go right for once, you know? I just want to get to be happy for a LITTLE WHILE. I don't want much, I just want to be able to look after myself enough that I can get stuff done. Stuff that might concievably lead to enough success that I won't need payments anymore, you know?
God I hate my life sometimes. Sometimes it just gets to be too fucking much.
