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Inexplicable sadness.
Feb. 3rd, 2007 07:26 amOne of those chronic illnesses I forgot to mention in that earlier health-bitching post was depression, which I'm pretty sure is clinical. For example, I've been waking up this week, inexplicably depressed. I can't really think of a reason for it. Sure, there are factors of my life that I'm less than happy with, but nothing that would make me feel so black. I'm hoping it's been PMS related, because I don't really need a depressive episode right now. I want to be happy - I *like* being happy. I've got a lot to be happy about. My body chemicals just don't seem to be on the same page as me.
So, I don't really know what to do. I could seek counselling, and I'm sure it'd be reassuring, but it would be weird cause I'd be sitting there going, "Uhm, well, I'm unemployed, but that's cause of the health problems. I keep myself busy, so that's okay. I have a lot of projects on my plate right now - that's really exciting. I'm going to a big sci-fi con at easter time, so that's super exciting. Ted Raimi friended me on MySpace and said he liked my music! That was a nice little cheer-up! I get sad that I don't have a boyfriend, but there's no use moping about that. I miss being as fit as I used to be, but I'm working on fixing that by altering my diet and trying to sort out this migraine problem. The most depressing thing for me right now is my teeth. I need to get my teeth fixed."
"...Teeth?"
"Yeah."
But teeth don't make you feel suicidal, do they? I hope it's the hormones, I really fucking do. :( Cause ugh - I don't need pointless reasonless bottomless depression right now.
So, I don't really know what to do. I could seek counselling, and I'm sure it'd be reassuring, but it would be weird cause I'd be sitting there going, "Uhm, well, I'm unemployed, but that's cause of the health problems. I keep myself busy, so that's okay. I have a lot of projects on my plate right now - that's really exciting. I'm going to a big sci-fi con at easter time, so that's super exciting. Ted Raimi friended me on MySpace and said he liked my music! That was a nice little cheer-up! I get sad that I don't have a boyfriend, but there's no use moping about that. I miss being as fit as I used to be, but I'm working on fixing that by altering my diet and trying to sort out this migraine problem. The most depressing thing for me right now is my teeth. I need to get my teeth fixed."
"...Teeth?"
"Yeah."
But teeth don't make you feel suicidal, do they? I hope it's the hormones, I really fucking do. :( Cause ugh - I don't need pointless reasonless bottomless depression right now.
