The Nancy/God Chronicles.

[logansrogue]

Dear God,
How dare you make me addicted to neopets. You should be whipped. Though, since you're omnipotent, you'd probably just like that, wouldn't you?
Your humble worshipper,
Nancy.

Dear God,
The theme-song to Thomas the Tank Engine totally rocks.
your humble boob buddy,
Nacey.

Dear Nancy,
You got addicted all on your own, so don't bitch to me. And thanks on the theme-song thing, even though it should probably go to some TV executive. Well, I created the executive, didn't I? I'll take the thanks after all.
Your major heavenly deity,
God.
~~~~~

Dear God,
My boobs hang on my chest. I don't like it.
Love,
Nacey.

Dear Nacey,
Well, it's either hangy boobs or zero gravity. Either way, you're fucked.
God.
~~~~~

Dear God,
Why did Victoria Beckham have to be born a bitch?
Nancy.

Nancy,
You have to have someone to rag on with a clear concience.
God.

~~~

Dear God,
What's with the fundies, man?
Nacey.

Nacey,
Don't look at me, they're Satan's doing.
God.
~~~~

Nancy.
(Was honestly surprised Nelly Furtado wasn't black).