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Heartbroken.
Mar. 22nd, 2009 12:43 amWhen I was around 20 to 24, I tried out for a lot of those talent shows. Australian Idol, Popstars, etc. One time they were having Popstars auditions at a local nightclub called Metros. I remember standing in a long line outside in the sun, and it was hot. I was optimistic and having fun, but part of me wondered what the hell I was doing there.
Looking down, I saw something sparkle golden in the sun. I stopped, bent down, and picked it up. It was a little gold chain, very fine, only two millimetres across. After examining it, I noticed that it wasn't broken - it was fine. I dusted it off, looked around to see if anyone had lost it. Nobody was looking for anything. It didn't seem like it was weak or malfunctioning in any way. So I kept it.
That day I put it on. It sparkled so brightly. I didn't get through the audition, but I didn't care. I felt like God and serendipity had told me that I was special, because of this little bracelet. Upon further examination, it was clear it was real solid gold. I guessed maybe some girl had a fight with a man and threw it on the ground or something. That's what I imagine. Because it upset me to think that someone lost something dear to them. I thought that maybe if I put out the energy that it was well-loved, treasured, it might make th person that lost it feel better.
I never took it off. Ever. I never needed to. It was gold, so it didn't react to water or anything (it's inert). It became a part of me. I never had the money for real gold, or to spend on jewellry like that. I felt like I was a little fancy, a little fabulous. Cause I had a real piece of gold. It was *my* piece of gold. My special trinket.
Tonight, looking down, I noticed it was gone. I've looked around, I don't remember taking it off. As I said - I didn't need to. My arm feels naked without it. I miss how it hung over my slim wrist, how it looked next to the colour of my skin. I miss how it glinted in the sunlight, and nothing could take the shine away. I loved how it was so beautiful and elegant, never ruined by the world around it. I imagined maybe the elegance of it rubbed off on me a bit.
It's just a piece of metal, I suppose. It doesn't really change me, and I can get another one. Still... it's sad. I really loved that bracelet.
Looking down, I saw something sparkle golden in the sun. I stopped, bent down, and picked it up. It was a little gold chain, very fine, only two millimetres across. After examining it, I noticed that it wasn't broken - it was fine. I dusted it off, looked around to see if anyone had lost it. Nobody was looking for anything. It didn't seem like it was weak or malfunctioning in any way. So I kept it.
That day I put it on. It sparkled so brightly. I didn't get through the audition, but I didn't care. I felt like God and serendipity had told me that I was special, because of this little bracelet. Upon further examination, it was clear it was real solid gold. I guessed maybe some girl had a fight with a man and threw it on the ground or something. That's what I imagine. Because it upset me to think that someone lost something dear to them. I thought that maybe if I put out the energy that it was well-loved, treasured, it might make th person that lost it feel better.
I never took it off. Ever. I never needed to. It was gold, so it didn't react to water or anything (it's inert). It became a part of me. I never had the money for real gold, or to spend on jewellry like that. I felt like I was a little fancy, a little fabulous. Cause I had a real piece of gold. It was *my* piece of gold. My special trinket.
Tonight, looking down, I noticed it was gone. I've looked around, I don't remember taking it off. As I said - I didn't need to. My arm feels naked without it. I miss how it hung over my slim wrist, how it looked next to the colour of my skin. I miss how it glinted in the sunlight, and nothing could take the shine away. I loved how it was so beautiful and elegant, never ruined by the world around it. I imagined maybe the elegance of it rubbed off on me a bit.
It's just a piece of metal, I suppose. It doesn't really change me, and I can get another one. Still... it's sad. I really loved that bracelet.
