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So every year at the end of November, Claremont kicks off the Christmas Season with a beautiful little festival in its two main streets that intersect in a "T": Bay View Trc and St. Quention's Ave. They block off both streets so it's this huge place and a parade goes through the two streets. Beautiful. Stalls are set up on the walkways off the sides of both streets and on the roads, and there's people dressed up and Christmas elves on stilts and kids with face paint, baby animals, you name it. Fun shit, totally cute as. Local organisations and businesses put up stalls and the shops are open late anyway thanks to Late Night Shopping on a Thursday.
(On a total side note, unrelated to my tale, Rogue just stepped on the phone. She pressed the answering machine message playback button without noticing. When a little male american voice (that sounds kinda like Fru) says "No messages", she looks around for the guy. She keeps doing it, too! LOL!)
Anyhow. Scotty, his friend Alana, our nephew David and myself decide to spice things up this year by dressing up as biblical characters. They usually have the Three Wise Men, Santa, they even had Austin Powers this year. Why not go in as Jesus himself, and his followers?
It was an interesting social experiment, that's for damned sure. Some teenaged girls wanted their photos taken with us. The teenaged girls were the best part of it, actually, giggling and crowing around Scotty. I'd never chase them but *boy* are they nice on the eyes.
Mum, ever the Catholic, was very worried we'd offend people. But you know what? Our warmest reception was from this utterly sweet woman from the church across the street from Hungry Jacks who was running a stall with this really cute nativity scene. It was the *only* shred of religion in the entire place and I was kind of surprised. It's not like I don't appreciate diversity - that's always been my favourite thing about the Christmas Parade in Claremont. Chinese dancers, belly dancers, fairies, street performers, Santa, elves, and usually some Wise Men and so forth.
But this year it just seemed really *noticable* to me, the lack of the presence of Jesus love around. And it seemed really rather odd because it *is* Christmas they're celebrating, it's kind of like a birthday without the cake, you know? Equal representation and all that jazz, that's what I'm about. And one tiny little display for ol' Jesus? Poor guy. It was a *really* nice nativity scene that lady had, and she was so utterly sweet, really enthusiastic and positive about Christianity, which always makes me giddy and warm when I come across it. What can I say? Love is love, and when someone has that much love for their fellow man and for the Spirit, in whatever path they choose to follow, it makes me so happy. I made a tasteless joke about the best thing about Jesus is that there's a kicking musical about him, and I really want to write to the woman at the church and say, "Hey, I'm so sorry about the joke, I was just in a cheeky mood cause I was so excited about being out and about and dressing up to surprise people." I did let her know before we moved on that I thought the nativity was really beautiful and thanked her for the nice leaflet she gave us. I hope she realises that I appreciate her hard work at that stall. Maybe I can send her a Christmas card or something LOL!
That said, Scotty got quite a reaction out of people. A couple of bemused looks, lots of "Hey, JESUS!", a lot of teenagers walking up to say hi. That surprised me a lot, the teenagers reacting so positively to him. I thought they'd be derisive but they were really quite amiacably amused to see him. People shot out some awesome jokes as we walked past.
At one point Scotty and I decided to replenish our dwindled alcohol supplies at the local Beer Wine & Spirits outlet on Bay View Terrace (right in the middle of the street in front of the thoroughfare). Dressed in full Mary regalia, I was digging around in this glass-fronted fridge, swearing my tits off and trying to get to the strawberry champers. I get to the counter and my brother is laughing at me, saying what a retard I look. "You can talk, you're in a kaftan!" I retort.
The clerk had some fun with me, as I believed him about them not taking fifteen cents and I was having trouble giving him the right money due to my purse holding notes and my little bag holding coins - a new setup I'm not exactly used to. (A new bright pink purse for Christmas, please, Santa!).
Anyway, so we walk out of the BWS, Scotty/Jesus carrying the brown bags of plonk. This random woman spots Scotty and *bursts* into laughter, making some awesome comment that I forget now. It was classic and I said to Scotty, "I should put those bottles in these bags here, huh?" He nodded.
OH YEAH! The local library stall were giving away FREE book bags and FREE MR. MEN BOOKS!!! SERIOUSLY! FUCKING FREE MR. MEN BOOKS! I was expecting to pay a dollar or two but they were for free! Scotty and I were SO EFFING JAZZED! Best freebie EVER. Scotty got Mr. Noisy (with the funky shoes) and I got Little Miss Fun (Little Miss Fun was always very happy. But when Little Miss Fun was organising a party, she was even HAPPIER!)
Oh oh oh! And Scotty, as Jesus went and sat on Santa's lap! He got glitter in his hair from a fairy and everything! Sadly I missed it cause I was trying to help Alana get in contact with her Gran. But it was taped, and Scotty is going to put up some of our experiences on Youtube.
The funnest point for me (cause I'd been in the background for most of the time) was when I left Scotty outside when I went inside the local all-nighter on the way home (it's just off a laneway on Bayview) to get some chinese rice crackers for snacks. I'm there, the clerk girl being SLOW AS and I'm seeing this horde of twelve/thirteen year old kids laughing and crowding Scotty. I'm itching to get out there, in my veil, Roman sandles and hefting my sacks of shopping. Thankfully there were still some there, and I come stomping out and look angrily at Scotty.
"I can't leave you for *FIVE* minutes, can I?" I exclaim in a slightly cockney accent.
Lost on the children, sadly. A couple laughed. One then asked me if I was a woman, rather cheekily.
"Yes."
"You don't look like one."
"Want me to prove it to you?"
Then he got lippy and my brother said, "Dude, you wouldn't even know what to do if you saw it."
I'd said the kid couldn't handle what I had. It wasn't mean, just cheeky and jeering, if you get what I mean. Boys at that age like to test the boundaries, but they quickly learn that coming up against Scotty isn't a wise thing to do.
When we were walking away, a group of four of five race after us. One hugs Scotty, and I think he actually groped Scotty's ass. It was reverse paedophelia and I was laughing so hard. Then they started saying they were gay and I said, "You know, I think it's really great that you're so accepting of your homosexuality." I nodded and looked serious.
It was at this point we broke away and went home. I'm sure I've forgotten some encounter, but Scotty and his video shall fill us all in nicely. All in all, a fun Christmas parade, and unexpectedly, rather than lovingly poke fun at Christianity, we might have reminded people of part of the reason why they were there celebrating in the first place. Which was kinda weird, but I didn't mind.
There wasn't any Chinese food stall there that year though, or Chinese dancers with the dragon. I was disappointed. It's not Christmas without beef in black-bean sauce, sweet and sour pork, rice-crackers, egg noodle and a dragon. :(
Merry Season, All.
Love,
Nancy.
(On a total side note, unrelated to my tale, Rogue just stepped on the phone. She pressed the answering machine message playback button without noticing. When a little male american voice (that sounds kinda like Fru) says "No messages", she looks around for the guy. She keeps doing it, too! LOL!)
Anyhow. Scotty, his friend Alana, our nephew David and myself decide to spice things up this year by dressing up as biblical characters. They usually have the Three Wise Men, Santa, they even had Austin Powers this year. Why not go in as Jesus himself, and his followers?
It was an interesting social experiment, that's for damned sure. Some teenaged girls wanted their photos taken with us. The teenaged girls were the best part of it, actually, giggling and crowing around Scotty. I'd never chase them but *boy* are they nice on the eyes.
Mum, ever the Catholic, was very worried we'd offend people. But you know what? Our warmest reception was from this utterly sweet woman from the church across the street from Hungry Jacks who was running a stall with this really cute nativity scene. It was the *only* shred of religion in the entire place and I was kind of surprised. It's not like I don't appreciate diversity - that's always been my favourite thing about the Christmas Parade in Claremont. Chinese dancers, belly dancers, fairies, street performers, Santa, elves, and usually some Wise Men and so forth.
But this year it just seemed really *noticable* to me, the lack of the presence of Jesus love around. And it seemed really rather odd because it *is* Christmas they're celebrating, it's kind of like a birthday without the cake, you know? Equal representation and all that jazz, that's what I'm about. And one tiny little display for ol' Jesus? Poor guy. It was a *really* nice nativity scene that lady had, and she was so utterly sweet, really enthusiastic and positive about Christianity, which always makes me giddy and warm when I come across it. What can I say? Love is love, and when someone has that much love for their fellow man and for the Spirit, in whatever path they choose to follow, it makes me so happy. I made a tasteless joke about the best thing about Jesus is that there's a kicking musical about him, and I really want to write to the woman at the church and say, "Hey, I'm so sorry about the joke, I was just in a cheeky mood cause I was so excited about being out and about and dressing up to surprise people." I did let her know before we moved on that I thought the nativity was really beautiful and thanked her for the nice leaflet she gave us. I hope she realises that I appreciate her hard work at that stall. Maybe I can send her a Christmas card or something LOL!
That said, Scotty got quite a reaction out of people. A couple of bemused looks, lots of "Hey, JESUS!", a lot of teenagers walking up to say hi. That surprised me a lot, the teenagers reacting so positively to him. I thought they'd be derisive but they were really quite amiacably amused to see him. People shot out some awesome jokes as we walked past.
At one point Scotty and I decided to replenish our dwindled alcohol supplies at the local Beer Wine & Spirits outlet on Bay View Terrace (right in the middle of the street in front of the thoroughfare). Dressed in full Mary regalia, I was digging around in this glass-fronted fridge, swearing my tits off and trying to get to the strawberry champers. I get to the counter and my brother is laughing at me, saying what a retard I look. "You can talk, you're in a kaftan!" I retort.
The clerk had some fun with me, as I believed him about them not taking fifteen cents and I was having trouble giving him the right money due to my purse holding notes and my little bag holding coins - a new setup I'm not exactly used to. (A new bright pink purse for Christmas, please, Santa!).
Anyway, so we walk out of the BWS, Scotty/Jesus carrying the brown bags of plonk. This random woman spots Scotty and *bursts* into laughter, making some awesome comment that I forget now. It was classic and I said to Scotty, "I should put those bottles in these bags here, huh?" He nodded.
OH YEAH! The local library stall were giving away FREE book bags and FREE MR. MEN BOOKS!!! SERIOUSLY! FUCKING FREE MR. MEN BOOKS! I was expecting to pay a dollar or two but they were for free! Scotty and I were SO EFFING JAZZED! Best freebie EVER. Scotty got Mr. Noisy (with the funky shoes) and I got Little Miss Fun (Little Miss Fun was always very happy. But when Little Miss Fun was organising a party, she was even HAPPIER!)
Oh oh oh! And Scotty, as Jesus went and sat on Santa's lap! He got glitter in his hair from a fairy and everything! Sadly I missed it cause I was trying to help Alana get in contact with her Gran. But it was taped, and Scotty is going to put up some of our experiences on Youtube.
The funnest point for me (cause I'd been in the background for most of the time) was when I left Scotty outside when I went inside the local all-nighter on the way home (it's just off a laneway on Bayview) to get some chinese rice crackers for snacks. I'm there, the clerk girl being SLOW AS and I'm seeing this horde of twelve/thirteen year old kids laughing and crowding Scotty. I'm itching to get out there, in my veil, Roman sandles and hefting my sacks of shopping. Thankfully there were still some there, and I come stomping out and look angrily at Scotty.
"I can't leave you for *FIVE* minutes, can I?" I exclaim in a slightly cockney accent.
Lost on the children, sadly. A couple laughed. One then asked me if I was a woman, rather cheekily.
"Yes."
"You don't look like one."
"Want me to prove it to you?"
Then he got lippy and my brother said, "Dude, you wouldn't even know what to do if you saw it."
I'd said the kid couldn't handle what I had. It wasn't mean, just cheeky and jeering, if you get what I mean. Boys at that age like to test the boundaries, but they quickly learn that coming up against Scotty isn't a wise thing to do.
When we were walking away, a group of four of five race after us. One hugs Scotty, and I think he actually groped Scotty's ass. It was reverse paedophelia and I was laughing so hard. Then they started saying they were gay and I said, "You know, I think it's really great that you're so accepting of your homosexuality." I nodded and looked serious.
It was at this point we broke away and went home. I'm sure I've forgotten some encounter, but Scotty and his video shall fill us all in nicely. All in all, a fun Christmas parade, and unexpectedly, rather than lovingly poke fun at Christianity, we might have reminded people of part of the reason why they were there celebrating in the first place. Which was kinda weird, but I didn't mind.
There wasn't any Chinese food stall there that year though, or Chinese dancers with the dragon. I was disappointed. It's not Christmas without beef in black-bean sauce, sweet and sour pork, rice-crackers, egg noodle and a dragon. :(
Merry Season, All.
Love,
Nancy.
