Crampage.

Dear God,

I had a morning of cramps not being QUITE so bad. Note the word 'cramps'. This does not cover JABBING ENDO PAIN.

And now - cramps again. Agonising, nausea inducing, bowel-irritating CRAMPS FROM HELL!

I'd really like to know what I did in a past life to deserve this. Was I a farting, grunting, wife-beating misogynist? Because I'm not anymore. I've learnt the error of my ways (if I ever WAS erring in that way). Now I'm a hairy-pitted, flag-waving, swearing, opinionated feminist.

Yup. Feminist here. Go womyn. Vagina power.

... I'm still hurting. Is this a life-long thing? How does that work? I want my karma to be instant, damn it all!

*heavy sigh*

Okay. You go on being omnipotent (albeit infuriatingly so). I'll go on being a writhing wreck of woman.

Yours faithfully,
Nancy.