That's exactly what it is, you know. You need to let yourself grow whole again, like the beautiful flower you are. In order to do that, you need to experience what you experience, and know that feeling like crap is part of that.
There is a part of this, of course, that's fighting. In a sense it's like putting up a trellis or a framework to support growing vines. It is, I think, important to put your strength into supporting the regrowth of the parts of you most injured, not letting this permanently rob you of the joy of that part of your life. SOrt of, "Don't let the bastards win," if nothing else.
But the fight to reclaim that joy is not the same as a denial of the pain. You gotta feel it, and make your way through, and you have to know and always remember that you can. It's not about being strong enough to hold it in. It's about being strong enough to collapse and sob and wail when you need to, and know that there are shoulders for you to cry on, arms to be wrapped in, and love to be supported by, all around you.
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dancing_serpent
(no subject)
Date: 2008-05-28 12:06 pm (UTC)There is a part of this, of course, that's fighting. In a sense it's like putting up a trellis or a framework to support growing vines. It is, I think, important to put your strength into supporting the regrowth of the parts of you most injured, not letting this permanently rob you of the joy of that part of your life. SOrt of, "Don't let the bastards win," if nothing else.
But the fight to reclaim that joy is not the same as a denial of the pain. You gotta feel it, and make your way through, and you have to know and always remember that you can. It's not about being strong enough to hold it in. It's about being strong enough to collapse and sob and wail when you need to, and know that there are shoulders for you to cry on, arms to be wrapped in, and love to be supported by, all around you.