FUCKING CAT!!!
Nov. 24th, 2007 03:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
logansrogueAll night, ALL FUCKING NIGHT she has been chasing this dying cockroach around the floor. A TWO INCH FUCKING RED WOOD COCKROACH. And the little yellow whoore chased the muthafucking thing RIGHT UP MY SKIRT until it was nestled in my CROTCH lovingly, enjoying the safe harbour that is my love-box, because, oh yeah - NOBODY GOES UP THERE.
Except my half-mad fucking CAT, apparently.
I didn't even noticed till I felt something moist touch my thigh and I knew it wasn't either of the following things:
- A nice erect cock
- my cat because she was sitting there looking at me in the hallway and not between my legs.
So I lift my volumous skirt and have a look and HELLO!! Red cocky between my gams! Not the kind of action I was after this weekend, I tell you! I let out a blood curdling scream, flick it off the chair once I realise it's not a huge fucking spider and flick it across the room.
And the little fucking furry bitch KEEPS BRINGING IT BACK TO ME. She likes chasing it around under my skirt and shoving it firmly under my bare foot. My cat is a CUNT! No, she can't wake me up with cute furry nuzzles and sit and purr in my lap. Oh no. Hell no. Never a thanks for cleaning up her shit and feeding her every day, doing everything for the thankless little bitch. No, she gives me DEAD FUCKING ARTHROPODS IN MY KNICKERS!
I am *this* close to becoming a dog person.
ETA: Awww. She's laid out by my feet, showing off her fluffy tummy and being adorable. Damn her cuteness.
Except my half-mad fucking CAT, apparently.
I didn't even noticed till I felt something moist touch my thigh and I knew it wasn't either of the following things:
- A nice erect cock
- my cat because she was sitting there looking at me in the hallway and not between my legs.
So I lift my volumous skirt and have a look and HELLO!! Red cocky between my gams! Not the kind of action I was after this weekend, I tell you! I let out a blood curdling scream, flick it off the chair once I realise it's not a huge fucking spider and flick it across the room.
And the little fucking furry bitch KEEPS BRINGING IT BACK TO ME. She likes chasing it around under my skirt and shoving it firmly under my bare foot. My cat is a CUNT! No, she can't wake me up with cute furry nuzzles and sit and purr in my lap. Oh no. Hell no. Never a thanks for cleaning up her shit and feeding her every day, doing everything for the thankless little bitch. No, she gives me DEAD FUCKING ARTHROPODS IN MY KNICKERS!
I am *this* close to becoming a dog person.
ETA: Awww. She's laid out by my feet, showing off her fluffy tummy and being adorable. Damn her cuteness.
